Relationships are supposed to be uplifting, right? You come home from a long day at work to find your sympathetic partner, ready to listen and support you.
However, as we all know, not all relationships are like that. If you are stuck in one that makes you feel tired, hopeless and miserable, you are probably desperately hunting for answers.
How to fix an emotionally draining relationship? Well, it is possible, though there are some things that you will have to start practicing. Read on for our best tips.
How To Fix An Emotionally Draining Relationship?
You’ll know if you are in an emotionally draining relationship. You will feel tired, drained, and spending time with your partner is a chore, rather than a pleasure.
You may feel as though you are walking on eggshells when you are around your significant other, just waiting for problems to arise.
Worrying about their problems constantly, not feeling affectionate toward them, and enjoying time on your own rather than with them is another big flag.
Don’t despair, however! There are a good few things you can do to fix this, as long as you love your partner and you still want to be with them.
- Become aware of the problem. Instead of constantly shelving the issues into a “To Do – Later” pile in your mind, acknowledge it consciously.
- Talk to your partner. They may have no idea that you are feeling the way you are, so it is important to explain your position – carefully and gently, when you are both feeling relaxed.
- Give yourself some time. Spending all your time worrying about your partner’s problems will drain you, so prioritize some self care.
- Spend time on yourself. Along with looking after yourself, carve out some time to enjoy any hobbies and interests that you may have been neglecting.
- Talk to friends and family. We’re not saying bad mouth your partner, but getting things off your chest to a trusted loved one can help you immensely. And who knows, they may even have some good advice!
- Take some time away from your partner. This will give you both time and space to miss and appreciate each other, as well as giving you some much needed breathing space.
Why Is My Relationship Emotionally Draining?
There is no blame to attach when it comes to being in an emotionally draining relationship. It is not your fault that you are in this position, and chances are your partner is unaware of it too.
Things can start to go wrong when, say, your partner is going through some problems and you start to help try to fix them.
As time goes on, you find that you have unwittingly slipped into the roles of victim and savior, at the expense of both of your mental health.
Another way emotional draining can happen is if your partner is controlling or belittling towards you. This is a sign of deeper problems, and needs to be addressed immediately.
You may slip into the area of emotionally draining relationships if you feel that you can’t be yourself around your partner.
For example, if you express an opinion that they disagree with, you may subsequently feel that you have to censor yourself, and this is not healthy.
When there are unrealistic expectations in a relationship, for example either you or your partner expect things from each other that cannot be delivered, this can cause problems.
How Do You Help Someone Who Is Emotionally Drained?
If you are dealing with someone who is emotionally drained by their relationship, there are a few things you can do to help them. These are all valid, whether it is your partner or your bestie who is in this position.
- Offering a sympathetic ear; not necessarily trying to fix things, is an important part of helping someone through an emotionally draining relationship.
- Validate their emotions. No matter what they’re feeling, they are going through something that deserves to be listened to and appreciated, even if it is not understood.
- Spend time with them. The best way you can do this is to get them outdoors, but you can also hang out with them doing their favorite activity, too. Just be there.
- Suggest resources. There is a lot of help out there for people who are struggling with emotional issues, especially those that are caused by relationships, so set them on the right path towards professional help.
- Give them safe space. People in emotionally draining relationships often need to give themselves time to get away – if you have a spare room you can really help with this!
How Do I Get The Emotional Connection Back In My Relationship?
Fixing an emotionally draining is not impossible – in fact there are a great many things you can do to restore your emotional connection:
- Share. Making yourself vulnerable to your partner can open up a dialogue that allows them to make you feel trusted and safe.
- Give affirmations. After a while, all the things you love about your partner can be forgotten about. Remember to compliment them and remind them – and yourself – why you love them.
- Prioritize sex. We’re not saying do it when you don’t want to, but physical connection is a great way to reconnect with a partner.
- Cuddles. Physical affection is just as important as sex in a relationship, so ensure that you and your partner have a bit of snuggle time once in a while.
- Try something new. It’s easy to get stuck in a rut in a relationship, so break out of the routine – go to a different restaurant; take a spontaneous mini break; start a new hobby together.
Anything that you can do WITH your partner to encourage a connection, or rebuild one that is lacking, is a great way to improve your relationship.
Now that you have a few more ideas on how to fix an emotionally draining relationship, hopefully you are feeling stronger and more empowered.